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Writing your own wedding vows is not only a beautiful and personal way to express your love and commitment, it has become an expectation. Knowing that their guest expect personally written vows that will blow them away fills many marrying couples with dread. But it doesn't have to be that way.  Keeping your vows simple, authentic, and heartfelt creates such an intensely personal moment that everyone present will be impressed.

Read on to discover the magic secret, my top three tips to help you craft vows that are both meaningful and memorable, without having to lose sleep over the process
 

1. Reflect on Your Relationship

Start by taking some time to reflect on your relationship. How did it unfold? Consider the following questions to help guide your thoughts:

•     What are some of the most significant moments you've shared?
•     How has your partner influenced or changed your life?
•     What qualities do you most admire in your partner?

Conventional advice is to use these reflections as the foundation for your vows. But, and it is a big but, your vows are not the place to tell your story. So there is another, critical step.

• Think. Write down your answers to each of the above. And then choose and distil.

You are looking for something to refer to, but not describe in detail. Something that, in a few words, sets the scene for why you've chosen to spend your life with this particular person. Something you can link with the moment you realised you had found your one. Something that answers your Why?

2. Be Authentic and Sincere

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Cancel any feelings you might have that you are not up to the task! You are totally capable of writing vows that are a genuine reflection of your feelings and the promises you want to make.

Resist the temptation of all the vows on the internet. Copying anything - a phrase, a sentence, or a whole vow - is anything but authentic to who you are. For a start, it will be highly unlike the way you normally express yourself. Your guests will know it's not you. Your person will know it's not you. And it is likely to come across as insincere.

The key is remembering 3 things:

• Sincerity makes more of an impact than perfection
• Speak from the heart: Use language that feels natural to you. There's no need for fancy words or posh language if that’s not your style
• Make meaningful promises: Focus on committing to things that truly matter to you, whether they are about supporting each other's dreams or sharing everyday joys.
  

3. Keep your Vows Concise and Clear

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Word to the wise: Long vows invariably include a lot of repetition. Concise means short! But it also means precise, no rambling and no repeating yourself. The most powerful messages are those that don't get lost in a forest of words.

• Aim for 1-2 minutes: This timeframe allows you to express yourself without overwhelming the moment. HINT: that's between 120 and 240 words approximately
  
• Focus on key points: Concentrate on what is most important to you, whether it is the qualities of your partner that you admire, the answer to your why? or the promises you intend to keep throughout your marriage, the promises that will be the glue that holds your relationship together.
  

Help is at hand

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If you feel that you need help to write your vows, but I've also convinced you that you need to use your own words, my Vows Magician personal vow writing service is available. This is a stand-alone service, available to anyone who would dearly love to make vows that will make their partner fall in love with them all over again, right there at the altar.

No matter where in the world you are located, for an extremely modest fee I  work closely with you to do all the hard work of writing vows that are totally, utterly, and authentically, you and you get all the credit. No-one else needs to know that you had help because, in the end, your input makes your vows totally you and yours. Magic indeed.

Related Information

• 7 Ways AI-written vows shortchange you and your marriage
• One, Two, and Three Word Vows
  
• Nail your Vows by doing these 3 simple things before you start writing
• Write Your Way to Happily Ever After: The Ultimate Guide to Writing Vows

Thanks for reading!